True Love

My lover Feonix has a new blog

In the most recent entry she has a clever poem about her love of Chad

which contains the passage

you look your blue eyes into my greenish-grey hazely-brown ones
and ask me if I think we will be together forever
and I squirm and say yes IF
it’s what we both want

And the first person to comment on it said she had (in the full piece) captured the essence of true love.  And this put me on a rant i thought i would share.

it is of course the perfect reply
“if we both want”
and yet for most it would be deeply unsatisfying

we are actually not on the path to “true love”
at least not the flavor which has been in favor
for the last couple of thousand years

“true love” if we read the fine print
is persistent
triumphs over adversity
works out its problems
[or does not have any in the fairy tale format]
and is exclusive

“true love” is to love
as “free trade” is to trade
it is a bastardized brand
a deceptively appealing labeling – everyone wants “true love”

what we are looking for is something more dynamic
some thing less focused on forever
and more in tune with where we are now
and who else is at play in our lives
at a dozen different degrees of touch and distance
and perhaps borrowing from the equitable trade movement
we are looking for “fair love”